Phone Calls
I love harasssing people who call me.. Either with a wrong number,
or trying to sell me something. These may or may not be funny, but they sure
are fun to make..
113005-sattelite.mp3 - Can they wear a black suit, red tie, and purple socks?
111905-richard2.mp3 - I want to take out a second mortgage so I can demolish my house
080705-ggw.wma - Sheeeit i dun wan dat shit
080305-creditcard.wma - Time machines are useful for 4x7 analysis
080105-ggw.wma - This call gets creepier and creeier.. Why wont they let me wear my ski mask and watch them film?
072105-survey.wma - This one was great.. Arguing with my nonexistent roommate, so I was bsaically talking to myself!
071605-inandout.wma - I was poisoned. The have 48 hour to comply with my demands OR ELSE
070905-loan.wma - The staff at my estate includes a car scout
061105-directtv2.wma - This dish is 18 by 24 inches, so thats less than a foot....
061105-directtv.wma - My favorite mornons call back..
052405-directtv.wma - Another call from Direct TV. Same people from yesterday.. They dont recognize I am someone completely different
052305-directtv.wma - Another call from Direct TV. 1 Problem, I need the dimensions as I need to wall paper the dish to match the wall paper on the outside of my house
052005-CreditCard.wma - Multiple Personalities - Nervouse Breakdown - Great call
bestbuy03.wma The conclusion of the trilogy - This time with FREE MOOOLA
bestbuy2.wma Continuing on with my favorite store
bestbuy01.wma After a full day of calling them at work, I am back at home recording away...
051105-reply.wma - Reply to the call below. My butler is making things up..
051105-mortgage.wma - It would be fun to talk like this all the time
051005-reply.wma - Confirming my free trip
051005-free-trip.wma - I just won a trip to..... Reno???
050905-loan.wma - They are calling me to setup a call for tomorrow. I'd rather have them come over for dinner..
050405-trumpet.wma - Alright!! A trumpet gig!!
050205-mastercard.wma - Another creditcard! I cant pay it becuase some very bad people are after me. It brings me to tears!
042505-creditcard.wma - Damn! Another credit card bill I have due. This time 'Tom' wants to pretend everything he bought was stolen
042505-hotline.wma - These guys are trying to sell me protection, but not for a high speed chase. When else would you need protection??
042505-sbc.wma - I am getting wireless internet even though I sound like I am dying
042305-directtv.wma - They want to put the account under my girlfriends social sec number, unfortunately she's deflated at the moment!
041805-discover.wma - I talked to 3 managers, and even got one of them to preview my book!
041605-nationalcard.wma - A fancy credit card with PROTECTION! Will it protect the apple I just bought?
041205-mastercard.wma - OH NO! I need to pay my $20 credit card bill, I dont have cash, but I do have baseball cards worth that much!
032605-mcdonalds.wma - There IS such a thing as a free linch!
032005-wifespaintings.wma - My friends sister bought a painting off of my wife, now his wife wants one
032005-trumpetscholarship.wma - UNR wants a donation. I want to make sure it goes to trumpet scholarships as I am a very busy trumpeter!
031905-directtv.wma - Direct Tv is trying to get me to buy a satellite, but they wont let me steal it like I steal cable
gaspoweredunisickle.wma - An invention that will revolutionize the way we travel.. An answerining service, but revolutionary nonetheless
030705-donation.wma - Fun with voices. Its fun to talk to people with two completely different voices. They'll listen if they think they are gettin money
030505-elcaminoinsurance.wma - A car insurance place wants me to switch. The problem is, they are not sure if they can serve my special needs for my 1979 El Camino
030105-Mortgage.wma - Trying to sell me a mortgage, but I cant do much because my new social security number hasnt come in yet...
030105-Police.wma - The COPS want a donation, I want them to purchase my new seat belt design